Wednesday, 25 April 2012

Unbeknownst – You’re Always “Quoting” Shakespeare. (Happy Birthday Billy!)

What would happen if we all spoke the way Shakespeare wrote? Would we fall in love more deeply and seek revenge more swiftly? Today just might be the day to find out.

Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel officially named this 448th birthday of Shakespeare, April 23, 2012, “Talk Like Shakespeare Day” (it’s not the first time) in conjunction with Chicago’s Shakespeare Theater, reminding us of The Bard’s contribution of more than 1,700 words and phrases to the English language, “including but not limited to ‘lackluster,’ ‘eyeball’ and brevity is the soul of wit.’”
How does one begin apeing The Bard himself? Fear thee not! There are a handy set of guidelines for Talk Like Shakespeare day that go as follows (more detailed instructions here):
Instead of you, say thou or thee (and instead of y’all,
say ye).
Rhymed couplets are all the rage.
Men are Sirrah, ladies are Mistress, and your friends are all called Cousin.
Instead of cursing, try calling your tormenters jackanapes or canker-blossoms or poisonous bunch-back’d toads.
Don’t waste time saying “it,” just use the letter “t” (’tis,t’will, I’ll do’t).
Verse for lovers, prose for ruffians, songs for clowns.
When in doubt, add the letters “eth” to the end of verbs (he runneth, he trippeth, he falleth).
To add weight to your opinions, try starting them withmethinks, mayhaps, in sooth or wherefore.
When wooing ladies: try comparing her to a summer’s day. If that fails, say “Get thee to a nunnery!”
When wooing lads: try dressing up like a man. If that fails, throw him in the Tower, banish his friends and claim the throne.
A number of comedians have filmed videos for the occasion, to show you how it’s done if you still need a little guidance (vote for your favorite here).
The idea is catching on well outside of Chicago. According to Broadway World, celebrations have been planned as far away as Armenia, where a movement is underway for the inclusion of “Shakespearean” as an official language option on Facebook, alongside “Pirate.”
If you cannot understand my argument, and declare ‘It’s Greek to me’,
you are quoting Shakespeare;
if you claim to be more sinned against than sinning,
you are quoting Shakespeare;
if you recall your salad days,
you are quoting Shakespeare;
if you act more in sorrow than in anger,
if your wish is father to the thought,
if your lost property has vanished into thin air,
you are quoting Shakespeare;
if you have ever refused to budge an inch or suffered from green-eyed jealousy,
if you have played fast and loose,
if you have been tongue-tied,
a tower of strength,
hoodwinked or in a pickle,
if you have knitted your brows,
made a virtue of necessity,
insisted on fair play,
slept not one wink,
stood on ceremony,
danced attendance (on your lord and master),
laughed yourself into stitches,
had short shrift, cold comfort or too much of a good thing,
if you have seen better days or lived in a fool’s paradise —
why, be that as it may, the more fool you, for it is a foregone conclusion that you are (as good luck would have it) quoting Shakespeare;
if you think it is early days and clear out bag and baggage,
if you think it is high time and that that is the long and short of it,
if you believe that the game is up and that truth will out even if it involves your own flesh and blood,
if you lie low till the crack of doom because you suspect foul play,
if you have your teeth set on edge (at one fell swoop) without rhyme or reason,
then — to give the devil his due — if the truth were known (for surely you have a tongue in your head) you are quoting Shakespeare;
even if you bid me good riddance and send me packing,
if you wish I was dead as a doornail,
if you think I am an eyesore,
a laughing stock,
the devil incarnate,
a stony-hearted villain,
bloody-minded or a blinking idiot,
then — by Jove!
O Lord!
Tut, tut!
For goodness’ sake!
What the dickens!
But me no buts —
it is all one to me, for you are quoting Shakespeare.

Source – Huffington Post

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